20 Comments

I’ve got my own:

Simon Bardfunkle

This amateur folk singer knows four chords and sometimes how to use them. He finds Tim’s quest fascinating and whenever he runs into them insists on making a verse or two about the knight. Tim can’t stand it.

As time goes on Bardfunkle picks up wayward musicians for his band - Bard and Feathered

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Yes I liked this myself, what’s wrong with that.

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Well my character is someone who hates everything but loves cheese, so I suppose she doesn’t hate everything!

Cheesy lady is her name and eating cheese is her game! When’s she’s not eating cheese she’s rooting for truffles! Truffles and cheese, a match made in heaven! When she’s sniffing for truffles do not get in her way, she will bowl you over, snarl in your face and plow right through you to get to the prize! Her favourite cheese is of course Gorgonzola, she likes to eat it on a bus, how offensive!!!!

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How offensive! I’d shove her and her gorgonzola right off the bus.

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What about the Granny?? Will she also be shoved off the bus?? 🤣

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Are you hungry? Are you cheese lady?

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You'll be pleased to know that she's in now and you can see her here in section 2: https://misadventure.substack.com/p/lore-of-the-land?s=w

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From Flora: Gaseous Clay. Spends every waking minute eating. If anyone comes between him and his food he releases a toxic cloud of gas from his ears, which are severely cauliflowered because he also boxes.

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I read this four times before realising the name was a pun. Now I feel a total fool!

To paraphrase Muhammad Ali, who is not relevant here at all:

Farts like a butter-cow, toxin you can’t believe.

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Lady Kackel the Necromancer. She can bring back the dead, with one small catch. Anything she reanimates can't stop laughing.

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Check section two out: https://misadventure.substack.com/p/lore-of-the-land?s=w

Gaseous and Kackel together as friends.

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This made me think I’d been reanimated by her as I am continuing to chortle to myself.

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Cam O’Flarge - Tim’s nephew

Ninja style, chameleon skin. Cam is a shy, self conscious guy, what he lacks in confidence he makes up in stealth, agility and most of all his love for his Uncle.

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Unsurprisingly I love a good pun name, I also like that this might make Tim Irish by association.

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https://misadventure.substack.com/p/lore-of-the-land - section 2... no mention of family relations though.. it might be a good reveal later on.

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Oh and another, Gregory Shrek: this small town ogre lawyer (he practices exclusively Ogre Law) just wants to do right by his two young children Phlegm and Snout, but it’s not easy in a world of prejudice and rabid rakasha’s roaming the streets.

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I’m aware that Gregory peck is the actor and I’m making a play on Atticus finch BUT who can resist that pun?

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Tash Navarro, cousin of Tim.

Speaks Spanish, Italian, French, Chinese and broken/pigeon English.

Wears blouses over her cargo pants. She somehow ends up carrying some of Tim's tools etc as he doesn't have any pockets.

She has red hair but is an extremely well balanced individual.

She also wears a belt with a key chain hook. She recognises most keys instantly.

She is also an accomplished paramedic.

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I too can recognise keys, look there’s some.

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https://misadventure.substack.com/p/lore-of-the-land - Section 2!

I hope you don't mind that I changed a few of Tash's traits!

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